A *tough tough tough* mudder

Finally, after almost 6 weeks of unwelcome rest due to an injury which prevented me from running my second marathon, I've returned to running. This time last year I was running 30ks, last week, I struggled to run 3 for the first time. It was a bit like learning to walk again, and a funny mixture of joy at being able to experience the miracle of running again and disappointment. I had not expected my shape to *go* so quickly; my levels of fitness seem to be at an all-time low and so are my levels of confidence.

This is not something you would normally expect to read in the running community. We are expected to be always bubbly and motivated, spark joy and ooze with endorphins, love our bodies and inspire others. But this is not always the case. I am now on the way to full recovery, but it's not only my body, but also my spirit that needs a good physio. The truth is, we get a fair share of our runner's highs over the course of our running lifespan, but we all have our runner's lows as well.

I have been going through a pretty bad patch lately in other departments too. Last year I came up with an idea of a running-related start-up. I was inspired by my then better-running-half who used to go wild with his porridge in an attempt to fuel his crazy triathlon training regimen. I joked he is making 'Runner's Delight' and that's how the idea of porridge made especially for runners was born. 10 months and bazillion hours spent on research and development, designing packaging, testing different recipes, writing copious amounts of text, I finally have a product that is awesome and ready to ship. The only crack of the issue is, for now it is too expensive to produce to ever bring any profit and the manufacturing process is proper hell. I've spend most of my weekends over the past 3 months packaging porridge till 4 or 5 am on a Sunday. Not exactly the kind of Saturday night fever you'd expect... There have been countless, really countless obstacles on my way and I often felt really helpless about them. I've always had very high expectations of myself and I always want to deliver great results, quick.  couldn't even find the words to There is no business model, no marketing budget, and the dream vs reality match has so far been a heavy defeat of the former.

When porridge takes over... my house is my warehouse; let's not talk about comfort...

But I decided not to give up. I've been doing faster but shorter runs every day for the past week, fartlek and relatively short (for me at least) (10-13 k) 'long' runs. I am getting stronger with every run.
I also decided not to give up with my porridge dream. I had an honest conversation with a friend of mine who's been working on this project with me over the past 10 months and I realised the only direction we can go now is forward. That the reality will always fall short of the dream and that blood, tears and sweat are a part and parcel of starting any project up, chasing any goal, let alone one as ambitous as Runner's Delight (a quantum of solace here...https://medium.com/boost-vc/9-things-entrepreneurs-get-horribly-wrong-when-starting-a-company-1a2032b68441)

So onwards and upwards! Now I can go for a run!